Last Week In Non-Golf Golf News
- Updated: July 24, 2016
A Beefy Match Made In Heaven
The best sponsorships are ones you don’t have to think about: Retief Goosen and Grey Goose, J.B. Holmes and Yum Brands, Matt Kuchar and Skechers…the list goes on.
Yesterday, Andrew “Beef” Johnston and fast-food roast beef leader in the clubhouse, Arby’s, agreed to one of the most logical deals in quite possibly the history of any sport.
He will don the Arby’s logo on the right sleeve of his shirt and back of his hat for the foreseeable future beginning at next week’s 98th playing of the PGA Championship. Specific details of the deal are unavailable, however they do still claim the meat is real.
This is an A+ example of how to grow the game, or at the very least how to promote a brand. Take a popular, likeable, down to earth guy, and embrace him instead of crushing him for his faults….what a strategy!
In the great words of David Puddy, “tonight feels like an Arby’s night”, although Beef seems to be what everybody wants for dinner.
This is a professional golfer.
Spieth’s Golf Shoes Are Smarter Than You
Under Armour announced this week they’ve created the first-ever custom, smart golf shoe for Jordan Spieth. As if the kid didn’t have everything already.
The shoe was unveiled last week at the Open Championship. It tracks steps, distance, and in Jordan’s case, time spent whining.
He clocked in at 13,541 steps, which factors in all of the stomping around he did at the media center complaining about how mean they are.
UA also said they are currently looking into a prototype bottle apparatus so that when it’s feeding time, “Jordan can get nourishment he needs necessary for performance.”
There’s Water On My Jetpack, Bro
In news nobody should care about this week, Bubba introduced his new jetpack to the world. Ironically, he’s also the only person who can make having his own jetpack not cool.
Apparently, Oakley and Martin Aircraft teamed up to design this contraption just to shut Bubba up.
“He kept asking and we kept saying no” a spokesperson from Oakley said. “Finally, after he cried uncontrollably in a project meeting for 5+ hours, we agreed it would be best to give this a-hole what he wants.”
According to Bubba, it will help grow the game. Sure…whatever you say.
“I’m just here to get paid.”
Fresh Fish
Tiger news always moves the needle, but this report is fishier than others.
On Friday, the Miami Herald reported that Tiger’s restaurant baby, The Woods Jupiter, was in violation of storing seafood at temperatures 20+ degrees higher than the state mandate, which can cause it to spoil.
It appears Tiger has always been fond of the stench of fish, but it usually never involved seafood.
When asked to comment, his agent Mark Steinberg responded with “this violation is a slap on the wrist…believe me, my client has smelt ‘fish’ much worse.” He continued with, “for legal reasons, I will not state her name on record.”
There were a few other minor infractions but according to the USGA and state health inspectors, nothing that would warrant a DQ.
