Phil Mickelson Says He’s Done Wasting Time Playing Courses With ‘Brutal Rough’

By Two Inches Short
Updated: October 5, 2018

Phil Mickelson has always been one to keep quiet when something is on his mind. We’re kidding. Lefty went full FIGJAM (Fuck I’m good Just Ask Me) following his opening round of the 2018-19 PGA Tour season at the Safeway Open in Napa.

Of course, Mickelson posted a -7 65 four days after not earning a single point in Paris and becoming the Ryder Cup’s all-time loser (22!!!)

Riding a wave of confidence after making 5 birdies (basically, more than he made in 3 Ryder Cup matches), Phil went all in declaring he’s done playing golf courses with rough!

“The fact is they had brutal rough, almost unplayable, and it’s not the way I play,” Mickelson boasted according to Golf Digest. “I don’t play like that. And here [Napa] I can miss the fairways, I can get shots out of the rough up on the green and it’s playable.”

http://gty.im/1042521500

We like easy golf courses too, Phil! The problem is it’s called golf.

He continued:

“And I’m 48. I’m not going to play tournaments with rough like that anymore, it’s a waste of my time. I’m going to play courses that are playable and that I can play aggressive, attacking, make a lot of birdies, style of golf I like to play.”

WASTE OF TIME! It’s weird he’s never won a U.S. Open.

http://gty.im/71234705

As for the set up at Le Golf National, Phil gave it a rare thumbs down citing that fairways have to be at least THIRTY YARDS wide for it to be fair.

“Well, it’s a unique situation in that the way the—the Europeans did a great thing, they did the opposite of what we do when we have the Ryder Cup here,” Mickelson said. “The fairways were 14- to 16-yards wide. Ben Hogan, who is the greatest ball-striker of all time, had a 5 percent margin of error. So if you hit the ball 300 yards, which we all hit it more than that, you need to have a 30-yard wide fairway to be able to hit it.”

Psst … the Euros played the same golf course!

Phil’s becoming an old man set in his ways … and we’re here for the show.

Between running after a putt at the U.S. Open and wearing button-down shirts, wearing a paper clip on his hat, AND somehow convincing Furyk he should play in FOURSOMES, he seems to be giving less and less of a shit about really anything.

Remember when he went on Feherty and wore a damn leather jacket? Exactly. Pretty soon he’s going to start reversing his golf cart without looking if he doesn’t do it already.