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The 7 Stages Of Losing Your Golf Ball
You follow through one-handed and lean listlessly to the left as you watch your ball sail wayward. If you were in a tour event, you’d have every marshal on the tee emphatically pointing their yellow signs to the right in an effort to avoid an injury.
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Going For It
You strut up to the tee box of the reachable par 5 like you’re hitting the last leg of Amen Corner tied for the lead on Sunday. You’ve played this hole hundreds of times and hit the green approximately once. But you’re about to about to increase that percentage marginally.
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Playing Through
You get up to the third green, fix your pitch mark, and throw some change on your ball. A quick glance at the fourth tee confirms that the group who’s been playing slow for the first three holes is showing no signs of acceleration, as player one hits his drive about 40 yards.
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The Bad Warm Up
You roll into the parking lot exactly an hour and four minutes before your tee time. Your arrival time should afford you a full warm up, a coffee, and a resulting bathroom break, before your tee time.
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4 Easy Ways To Tell If You're A Slow Golfer
Typically the slow group contains one or two main culprits. The issue is nobody ever thinks it’s them. So let us help you out. If you can’t spot the slow player in the group, it’s probably you.
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The Provisional Ball Conundrum
You take the club back quickly, transition even quicker, and jerk it down like you’re mining for diamonds in the Congo. You lift your head at least a full second early and deliver an over the top strike that starts left, dives further left, and takes a hard left bounce toward a white stake.
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The Silent Cart Ride
As he comes back to the cart, you have no idea what to say. You buy yourself some time by going to fill his divot, hoping this good intentioned act won’t be construed as passive aggressive in his fragile state. You sit back down and step on it.
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Outside the Ropes
PGA Tour Ditching “These Guys Are Good” Slogan For “Live Under Par” (????)
By Two Inches Short
/ April 10, 2018
In some sort of sick, perverted joke the PGA Tour announced on Tuesday that they are changing their slogan from...
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Tags:
Golf
,
Live Under Par
,
PGA Tour
,
Slogan
,
These Guys Are Good
Outside the Ropes
Patrick Reed Continues To “Ride” Masters Hot Streak
By Two Inches Short
/ April 10, 2018
Bad newspaper headlines are a tradition unlike any other, but this one is better than most. In an attempt to...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Golf
,
HAHA
,
Headline
,
Patrick Reed
Outside the Ropes
PHOTOS: Masters Champ’s Media Tour In NYC
By Two Inches Short
/ April 10, 2018
One of the many perks of winning the Masters in addition to the $1.98 million, green jacket, etc, is the...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Media
,
NYC
,
Patrick Reed
Tour Feed
PHOTO: Tony Finau’s Gross Dislocated Ankle That He Played On At The Masters Will Haunt Your Dreams
By Two Inches Short
/ April 9, 2018
Augusta National is one of golf's toughest tests, but it's infinitely tougher when you are playing on a dislocated ankle...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Ankle Injury
,
Photos
,
Tony FInau
Outside the Ropes
WATCH: Is This The Most Timely Dick Adjustment In Masters History?
By Two Inches Short
/ April 9, 2018
"It all comes down to this. Two putts to win the Masters..." Patrick Reed lines up his nervy 25-footer down...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Adjustment
,
Augusta National
,
HAHA
,
History
Tour Central
5 Quick Observations From Day 4 At The Masters
By Two Inches Short
/ April 9, 2018
It's a wrap at the 82nd Masters Tournament. Sunday's final round was one of the most anticipated in recent memory...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Augusta National
,
Golf
,
PGA Tour
Tour Central
5 Quick Observations From Day 3 At The Masters
By Two Inches Short
/ April 7, 2018
Moving day at the Masters did not disappoint. The world's best took advantage of the wet, calm conditions on Saturday...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Augusta National
,
Golf
,
PGA Tour
Tour Central
2018 Masters Tournament Purse Breakdown
By Two Inches Short
/ April 7, 2018
The Masters Tournament is full of traditions, one being it's lucrative purse. After all, it is a major. The 2018...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Augusta National
,
Major
,
Prize Money
Tour Central
5 Quick Observations From Day 2 At The Masters
By Two Inches Short
/ April 6, 2018
Round two is in the books at the 2018 Masters and the weekend it's shaping up to be a dandy....
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Augusta National
,
Golf
,
PGA Tour
Outside the Ropes
Sergio’s Wife Fires Back At Golf Channel Reporter
By Two Inches Short
/ April 6, 2018
If Sergio Garcia had any hopes of repeating as Masters champion, they were washed away on the par-5 15 known...
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Tags:
2018 Masters
,
Augusta National
,
Defensive
,
Jokes
,
Sergio Garcia
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